 | | | | Taking Care of Yourself
You have just gotten your son or daughter on the bus to ECSE and start to make today’s calls: to the OT to ask for clarification on one of the goals; to the hospital to check on test results; to your child’s teacher to tell her of a doctor’s appointment next week, to the insurance company to do battle over a bill that they said would be covered. Then it’s onto the paperwork. There are stacks of forms to fill out. You sign a few information releases to drop in the mail, salute the stack of recommended reading that various professionals have handed to you, then quickly try to make order in the house before the kids arrive home.
If this, or something equally busy, sounds familiar to you, take a moment and ask yourself, “What about me?” If you are not already taking time to meet your own needs then I would encourage you to stop and do so. As your child’s main caregiver and systems manager, you need to take care of you!
I know, I know, in the face of so much need and so much to do it may sound selfish, inefficient and just plain not possible. And as I tearfully told of my struggles to help my child, a very good doctor I know responded with “You need to stop and take care of yourself. You’re going to be in this a long time. If you keep going at this rate you’ll burn out and then what use would you be to your child?” He was right. I was making myself crazy trying to figure out what would be most helpful to my son, which in the long run was not helpful to him or to me.
As I examined my new life, I noticed that all the things that I’d done “before” that helped me stay centered were gone. I’ve since remedied this in my life to the great relief of my entire family. So I ask, what are you doing for you? Do you take walks; sit in the sun; take hot baths; long showers; exercise; journal; play, without a therapeutic goal, with your kids? Do what brings you peace. It need not take long, even ten minutes is better than none. Do it for you. Do it for your child. Who knows, maybe it will be the best therapy yet for your child: a balanced parent.
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